Semester One – Term 1 | Assignment One | Essay 1
Creative Writing: My Favourite Place in Singapore
To select a place, road, lane in Singapore that interests you. Write a 500word PERSONAL Essay in as creative a way as you like about the area, you have selected.
My Stairway: Yishun Primary School
She caught my attention whenever I walked past her through walls of plastic and steel. She was lively and active in the day, quiet and decent in the night. My heart poured with sweet and sour. Six years of friendship ended in the year 1998. She introduced me to friends that last till today and counting.
She dressed all over ? not quite sure what you mean here of the past, so fragile yet so devious. She continues to see it. Climatic ?? (Jane) hands that press. Her temples and my chest enter the night. She is everything and more. The solemn hypnotic, my Dahlia bathed in possession.
I**(Jane) get nervous, perverse, when I see her it's worse. But the stress is astounding. Hard to say what caught my attention, fixed and crazy. Aphid Attraction carves my name in my face, to recognize such a pheromone cult to terrorize. She is everything to me, the unrequited. She's a myth that I have to believe in. strongly expressed and well done!!(Jane)
Today she is fire that makes you run towards her. Doing her best and being the best is what she taught me. We played hard and worked hard.
"The city would not be what it is without her." I said.
"Totally agree with you." Anthony replied with pride.
"Do you still remember how many times we fought in front of her?” Warren added with yesterday laughter.
"That's how we all met, isn't it?" I added.
We will stop in front of her gate each time we walked past her. And yesterday glory and honor will be the topic for that moment.
"If wasn't her, we might not have such glory today." Warren said
"That was when our** bond grew stronger." I added looking at the empty track and field.
"Unfortunately, I joined in at the last year with you all." Anthony grumbled.
Laughter lasted outside her gate. Inside, hoping she understands how much she meant to us and more, appreciating her in silence.
Today, she is quiet and unnoticed every single day. Emptiness covers the area. She will be gone in no time, I know. She is, already moved to a new location but her spirit remains within where I met her.
"She changed so much since you left." my mother will always start the conversation about she and I each time we walked pass her.
"Ya, I still remember she kept lots of animals in the garden.” I continued, "Still remembering the first year, I still saw a goat and feeding it."
"You remember what you said before you even really met her and talk to her?" mother asking the same old question and she will continue posing my vocal and expression.
However something will never change. The art pieces we did before we left, are still on her. It was tattooed for memories, each piece of tile, carved with names and class.
Today, she is gone. She needs to rest, but her memories remains.
Thank you, Yishun Primary School.
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Semester One • Terms 1 • 3rd August - 25th September 2009
Assessment Form Developed and Written by Ms Jane Allan
Assignment One: Essay 1 – Creative Writing – My Favourite Place in Singapore
Start Date • 6th August 2009 • Due Date • 11th September 2009 – Via The Learning Portal
Name of Student: Jesmen Tan Jin Lin Student Number: 11352
Class: FS 1A CCS Tutor: Jane Allan
Essay Title: My Stairway: Yishun Primary School Date Submitted: 11 September 2009
Response to Details of Brief
Image[s] included
Title Provided, correct Font used, word length adhered to. Essay submitted to Learning Portal as word document including Assessment Form. List of sources.
25%
A= 18-25, B= 15-17, C= 13-14
D= 10-11, E= 9, F= 0-8
Comments and Feedback
Everything in this section is just fine you have clearly taken care to ensure that you adhere to all key elements as specified in the brief. This standard should be maintained in future essays. I also like the micro and minimalist approach especially the use of the school logo as your image. (Jane)
Grades A
Points 20
IMAGINATIVE, PERSONAL and CREATIVE content of Essay.
50%
A= 35-50, B= 30-34, C= 25-29
D= 20-24, E= 17-19, F= 0-16
So far, and I have read more than half the essays this one is by a long way the most imaginative and also the one which shows a true understanding of the Calvino text that we read.
(Jane)
Grade A
Points 40
Use of English
25%
A= 18-25, B= 15-17, C= 13-14,
D= 10-11, E= 9, F= 0-8
Some minor errors so please keep an eye on these and read as MUCH as possible to ensure you develop your English skills to the maximum. Most of the relatively minor errors relate to the use of verbs and tenses.
I think your use of dialogue is strong and shows a good sense of style.
(Jane)
Grade B
Points 17
Overall Comment
This is very promising and demonstrates a keen understanding of what has been done so far in the CCS module/Please keep it up!
(Jane)
Overall Grade A
Overall Points 77
